Hymns

Every once in a while I highlight a song on this blog. I really should have highlighted more songs we sang in South Africa and DRC. I realize how much I miss the much more daily singing and praise and dancing in South Africa. I realize this most when I am in a large group of people singing.

But when it comes to United Methodist hymns or hymns Methodist sing a lot things strike a cord with me. Blessed Assurance was the first song at the United Methodist Women District Annual Meeting I am at right now. It is actually not my favorite tune, but I have heard it in so many languages now that memories flow as it is played.

Then a choir sang "We are Called" which has a special place in my heart from singing around the piano at Dumbarton UMC with the people who taught me what being called met. I love the song, and the energy it is sung with there. At a conference in DRC I realized singing was the way to engage people. So in front of 500 people cut my presentation a little short to sing We Are Called in front of the entire room. It is moments like that I know I am not acting alone, but am lead. Or a bit crazy.

Today we also had communion. The last song the leader started was "One Bread, One Body". The message is one I think we need constant reminding of. But also it makes me feel safe and at peace. The sing reminds me what I am connected to. And as the others the places of home I have sung it.

And then towards the end of the session we sang "Hymn of Promise". Part of the reason hymns are important to me is the connection to my Grandmother Mary Lou Hanson. I believe she is the root of my being Methodist. There were other family members before her, and my parents decisions, and some really great United Methodists I grew up with and work with. (there are also other things more connected to beliefs, but that is for a different more complex discussion).

My grandmother died 7 1/2 years ago and my Dad decided to have "Hymn of Promise" sung at her funeral. I remember wanting some other song, that today I can't remember. It was an interesting time for me in understanding my identity as a women in our family and the strength my Grandmother had. The words of the song are written on the wall of my room in my Dad and Janes house. (One of the only times I remember getting away with writing on the wall. )

So when I hear the song I remember home and my Grandmother.

and especially as with all these hymns

I imagine my grandmother singing them

And I lift my voice in song.

October

I love fall on the east coast (of the US). This far south where we have days that still reach 90 degrees (though we are really moving into the 80's) aren't quite the same. Some in Florida swear to a difference in the air, but the signs of change are very small. From what I can tell there is only one tree near me that has bits of colors changing.

Then thinking I won't get to see all the fall colors, I am struck by the sunset one night. So stop to take in the colors from a parking lot.

DREAMers and Organizers

My friend Mayra, who inspires me and pushes us all to do more. Check out a local article on her below.


Again in my last blog the crux of the issues is human suffering (and its human suffering in our neighborhoods) and an attack on human dignity. I know I should be more careful or provide better explanation.

But instead let’s talk about something that gives me energy. I said I worked with some incredible people. As we are in the last few days of the DREAM Sabbath, I am inspired by the small things I have seen happening as DREAMers tell their stories. I am inspired as I see interest and care grow in groups I was unsure would really listen. In Africa I wrote a few times on the importance of sharing stories and how it was asked that everyone (all) shared stories. My friend Lucas was speaking to my young adult group and someone thanked him for sharing his story. He eloquently responded with gratitude and that they all had stories of such important worth as well. Its moments like this all my “lives” connect, the same themes are necessary.

When I speak about HIV, I explain how my journey with stigmas and fears developed. I did not think I really had any, until I realized the day when I truly did not care or question what your HIV status was. Of course I would care if you share anything with me or need something. But a person’s identity is not a disease.
The same has happened here. I was driving some friends one day. They were asking me questions about South Africa and as I got into the conversation, I realized due to their immigration status they would not be able to travel to South Africa until something changed, or maybe ever. It wasn’t this moment I really thought about the difference of driving and depending on what state we were in their status really does make a difference in whether I drive them or not – legally. I do not change, and they do not change as people if we are driving and cross a state line.

As my friends who have been working on the DREAM Act are baffled that it hasn’t been passed yet, I start to feel old. Or maybe more excepting of a reality that shouldn’t be there. Or know that while they are organizing like veterans of this moment, there are others that have been in it over 10 years. I am still inspired that the people I learn from in terms of organizing weren’t even 10 when the DREAM Act was first proposed. (I think community organizing is the best part of my job, and it is only a very small part.) Not that age is a big thing, just startling sometimes when you are in a Board meeting and someone who seems your age and in the grand scheme of things is, but they share they are 17.

So let me stop rambling and share a story of my friend Mayra with you.


http://www.theledger.com/article/20111002/NEWS/111009877?tc=cr

Burn Out or angry together

Someone recently asked me if I was getting burned out. He was very sincere and was reacting to my explanation of my job and the legal and social difficulties facing immigrants in Florida. I laughed to myself, because at 25 if I was burnt out after 6 months in a job I would be a little concerned. I also know burnout is just not an option or letting an situation get hopeless. I respect too many mentors or people that I have studied that even in the coldest and darkest places pull through.

Back to my situation, some days things are frustrating. When I first got here I would get so frustrated (but always hid behind a smile) when people wouldn’t listen to what I was saying or would justify inaction. At this point, I have calmed down a bit and take more seriously meeting people where they are. I am less offended when people put me in my place as a young woman, even when if they just listened they would learn something. I appreciate the opportunity for any discussion much more now. Some days maybe I do not push enough because I want to make absolutely sure I am being respectful, especially to pastors I meet with. But somehow and sometimes in places I least expect it, I am with groups who are so genuine and sincere. Maybe they are genuine about their own point of view, or in an ability to ask good questions and learn, or they have their own migration story they share. Those days I learn a lot and am extremely thankful for an honest point of conversation. Those days make me remember to leave my preconceptions at the door, because maybe someone else’s preconceptions aren’t what I think.

I get frustrated when I meet really interesting people who we can’t do anything for in the legal system. This would probably be where the man’s comment of burnout came from, as it gets the most personal of the frustrations. Some days it is heartbreaking, but some days facing reality is. In fact some situations make me angry, especially when it is young people just trying to find a way to act with integrity. But when I am with people, I am generally happiest. Even when one problem can’t be solved, we find a space to talk and laugh and share. Maybe that sounds horrible, that a human face and stories we can do nothing about doesn’t make me angrier. I guess it is that I am rarely frustrated directly at the client and as I have written about before, its heartwarming to see a group of strangers become a cross-cultural community in an evening. And if I start feeling helpless or hopeless, how can I ask anyone else to act. At the end of the day under all the forms and fees and borders and expired licenses and raids, at the end of the day under all of that is a place for hope and for smart action.

And about 6 months in I think the best part when I do get really angry or frustrated – is I have some good people to do it with. I may not have a large group of friends here, but I have some incredible colleagues. Some who have long journeys with a change of heart or experience. Some who have worked hard and been very secretive about their lives. And some who have found strength in not being so scared and publicly talking about their status. Some who are finding creative ways to bring everyone to the table. Some who are passionate about justice, and some who are just tired.

I think if we are going to be angry or if we are going to try to find hope, it is much better to do it together. It can help protect against burn out and ensure we use all that emotion to get somewhere.